JAYA the TRUST COACH
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diamonds & trust nuggets

You've cleaned something up before:

7/7/2019

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Use what you gained to clean up your messiest stuff that won't seem to go away.
 
I want to invite you to what you already know and show you a simple way to apply it to the thing that mystifies you—that area of life where you sometimes call yourself hopeless and you shake your head (or fist) (or entire self, mentally, like a mean cartoon parent). In this brief post, I’ll show you a quick, potent way to frame what you’ve already cleared or conquered or mastered (perhaps surprising your old self) and bring it to the stubborn spot. It literally involves making 2 lists. That's it.
 
What's your rough spot? Money, for me, is that tricky life challenge, the thing that’s been (and continues to be) a life’s journey to bring into alignment. I’ve gotten okay with this: all human beings have something, and I’m a human being. I invite you to get okay with the thing that most throws you off, and to apply the following trick to that: relationship, sex, food, health, your body, pain, work/career, socializing, some creative pursuit or field of knowledge, emotional well-being, communication, letting go—whatever it is.
 
What I saw, in one of those inspired flashes (you know the ones), was that the same mindsets I’d learned and consciously taught myself to hold toward food could be true for money, so I wrote down some statements that roughly express mindsets I’ve adopted with food, knowing they’d be true for money too. I made this first list seeking to consciously focus just on food (as best I could).
 
Why food for me? This is the best point of departure for the exercise: something that was somewhat problematic earlier in life (and probably along the way, perhaps even after some major clean-up), but that you've been able to bring into alignment (perhaps some time ago, that you've likely continued to make adjustments around as you go).
 
You’re not a newbie. Honor your own experience and wisdom gained. Consider what you’ve cleaned up, healed, gotten a handle on that used to be not so pretty or not so easy to manage. Make your equivalent list from the food list that follows, using language that feels right to you. These statements express what's real and true for me now that did not use to be:

  • I’m willing to give time and energy to my healthy relationship with food.
  • I’m willing to use resources to get my hands on good food (through shopping, gardening, bartering, receiving).
  • I’m willing to prepare food that truly feeds me.
  • I’m willing to clean up around food (as in taking care of dishes, leftovers, compost).
  • I’m willing to let food nourish me.
  • I’m willing to make healthy food choices.
  • I’m willing to enjoy food, to relish it, to let it bring me pleasure.
  • I’m willing to eat the right amounts of food.
  • I’m willing to notice when I’m off with food and course-correct (without attacking myself).
  • I’m willing to eat consciously.
  • I’m willing to love food.
  • I’m willing to let food love me.
  • I’m willing to distinguish between fake and real self-care around food.
  • I’m willing to keep growing a relationship with food, tweaking as I go, responding to the realities of the moment—as opposed to running on old ideas, holding on to obsolete concepts of what does and doesn’t work for me, insisting on the old stories of food, or of me and food, that actually don’t fit anymore.
  • I’m still willing to eliminate foods that I love, introduce foods that aren’t familiar, organize my current diet around what makes me feel good now, do whatever I need to do to maximize my well-being in relation to food.
  • I’m willing to let food be guilt-free.
  • I’m willing to let food taste good.
  • I’m willing to be functional with food, healthy with food, happy with food.
  • I share food with others in an easy, loving way. This brings me joy.
  • I’m willing to have a history with food. I’m willing to be on an evolutionary journey with food. I’m willing to keep getting current with food.
  • I’m so happy for how blessed I am with food in my life.
  • I love food. I’m willing to love food.
  • I love myself and my perfectly imperfect relationship with food.

Once I had this list, it was easy to go through it again substituting the word money anywhere the word food appeared (with small tweaks here and there, where a slightly different wording made more sense). I sought to feel each assertion again as if it were brand new—and it truly was; it was downright illuminating to imagine bringing to money the same lessons learned with food.
 
So here we go again. But not again, really—for the first time. This is the first application of kinder, simpler thoughts of allowing and aligning, in this case with that stubborn, still problematic life challenge—money for me and, for you, whatever you know it to be:

  • I’m willing to give time and energy to my healthy relationship with money.
  • I’m willing to use resources to get my hands on good money (through working in my most aligned way, opening to unexpected sources, investing, receiving).
  • I’m willing to prepare for spending and receiving money in ways that truly feed me.
  • I’m willing to clean up around money (as in taking care of banking tasks, bills, taxes).
  • I’m willing to let money nourish me.
  • I’m willing to make healthy money choices.
  • I’m willing to enjoy money, to relish it, to let it bring me pleasure.
  • I’m willing to charge and spend the right amounts of money.
  • I’m willing to notice when I’m off with money and course-correct (without attacking myself).
  • I’m willing to receive money consciously.
  • I’m willing to love money.
  • I’m willing to let money love me.
  • I’m willing to distinguish between fake and real self-care around money.
  • I’m willing to keep growing a relationship with money, tweaking as I go, responding to the realities of the moment—as opposed to running on old ideas, holding on to obsolete concepts of what does and doesn’t work for me, insisting on the old stories of money, or of me and money, that actually don’t fit anymore.
  • I’m still willing to eliminate spending that I love, introduce money strategies that aren’t familiar, organize my current revenue and spending around what makes me feel good now, do whatever I need to do to maximize my well-being in relation to money.
  • I’m willing to let money be guilt-free.
  • I’m willing to let money feel good.
  • I’m willing to be functional with money, healthy with money, happy with money.
  • I share money with others in an easy, loving way. This brings me joy.
  • I’m willing to have a history with money. I’m willing to be on an evolutionary journey with money. I’m willing to keep getting current with money.
  • I’m so happy for how blessed I am with money in my life.
  • I love money. I’m willing to love money.
  • I love myself and my perfectly imperfect relationship with money.
 
That’s it. For me, this was profound. I took my time feeling it, and it gave me a great sense of expansiveness, relief, opening to new possibility (all of which I consider signs of alignment from my guidance system!). Do it for real with your substitutions. Do it out loud or in writing, not just in your head. Nail it. Clearly bring to view the opening to a new, wider, more beautiful, perhaps truly liberating vista.
 
I want to close with expressing appreciation for Michael Beckwith and his teachings about radical visualizing/visioning that begins with feeling into and getting centered in some aspect of life where you feel great (connected, allowing, in the flow), then visiting your scary place while you hold that energy; and for Sarah McCrumm and her teachings about money, which opened me to the crazy idea of easy, healthy, sweet connections possible for me in that thorny realm.
 
 Love & blessings, Jaya

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